Pointless Post #108 - Greatest Fear Edition

I think one of my greatest fears would be that if I was using a toilet in a public restroom and for the fire alarm to suddenly go off.  The instantaneous shift from eerily, silent peace and quiet (assuming no one else is in there) to a mind-numbing shrill of the alarm would probably be enough to knock me off the porcelain throne.

This is all hypothetical of course.

Pointless Post #107 - Priorities Edition Revisited

While talking with a female colleague:

Colleague: [blah blah blah] ...and my ten-year career plan.
Me: [with a look of amazement at her and simultaneous disgust at myself] Ten-year plan??? I don't even know what I'm eating for dinner tonight!

This is one of the differences between men and women.

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Last night I reached for my spool of floss and pulled out a tiny, waxed thread only to discover that I had run out of floss.  Shortly after, I went to bed wondering when I had last purchased floss...

This morning while examining that same spool to make sure I was indeed out of floss (half asleep last night), I discovered my handwriting on the bottom of the container in black sharpie.  I felt an immense sense of closure, smiled to myself, and them updated it with another date in blue sharpie. 

Good job past-Tim, good job.

~13 months to use 183m.  Not bad.

Pointless Post #106: Dat Waistline Edition

After arriving at church this morning, it dawned on me that I'd forgotten to put my belt on, yet my jeans fit perfectly.  Not too tight; not too loose.  I bought these jeans about a year and a half ago with a little lee way in the waist, but I guess I've finally "grown" in to them.  Yay me.

I am eating a bag of chips as I write this.  No regrets.

Man, my phone camera sucks.

Pointless Post #105 - Avocado Edition

The amount of avocados I ate in a two week period last month exponentially exceeded the total amount of avocados I ever ate in my whole life prior to that time period.

Pointless Post #104 - BYOShoehorn and Popcorn

I have been known to bring my own full size shoehorn (none of those dinky pocket ones) to relative's homes I'm visiting, knowing it'll make my life easier when I need to put my shoes back on when leaving.

And eating popcorn while lying down in bed is hard, but not impossible.  Happy 2017.

Pointless Post #103 - Trump for Prez edition

I feel like now would be a good time to start saying pro-Trump things on Facebook, just to see how many people unfriend me.  I'm really, really considering it.

Pointless Post #102 - Chicken Nugget Edition

Is there anything more beautiful than a chicken nugget?





(The answer is "No.")

Pointless Post #101 - Slam Dunk Edition

Aaron Gordon, eat your heart out.

Pointless Post #100 - Wii Drake edition

I think I like "Hotline Bling" by Drake because it reminds me of the Wii Shop Channel music and I could listen to that loop for hours.


Australia was fun! Will post pictures in the next few days.  Here is a teaser:

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Before leaving, gas was about 120.9¢/litre.  It's been in the low 120s since I've been back.

Pointless Post #99 - Happy New Year edition

While defogging the car this evening, I saw weird lines on my windshield.  It looked like someone was drawing large letters perpendicular to a normal viewpoint AND I was reading it backwards......oh wait now I could see it. Some dumb kid wrote the F-word across the glass when it was frosty earlier in the day.

Classless brat.

I think I used about 10 squirts of wiper fluid and there was still oily residue from his fingers left behind on the windshield causing reflective glare from oncoming headlights.  I washed it off with a squeegee at a gas station.  Happy new year to me.

2015 is right around the corner. Just bring it suckah. God is on my side, right?

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Gas still going down....I've seen it as low as 103.9 a few weeks ago. I filled up at 108.9 today, but I saw 105.9¢/litre.Awww yea.

Pointless Post #98 - Priorities Edition

I bought myself a bag of chips on Saturday, fully intending to eat it during the weekend, but then I was hit with food poisoning on Sunday (the last thing I remembered was eating half a sub and a cookie) and since then it's been miniscule smatterings of "meals," water, and uncontrollable and excessive visits to the washroom.  Yesterday's 4am wakeup call was rough. Ugh.

For the most part, my thoughts have been predominated by making sure I'm not behind at work, recovering, staying warm (so many chills!), and whether or not I'll be able to keep food/liquids inside of me, but a good chunk of my thoughts of me wanting my body to return to 100% is so that I'll be healthy enough to eat that bag of chips. That crunch, that texture, that crisp, burst of salty goodness once it hits the tongue and delicious aroma of fried potato that envelopes my senses. Mmmmm.

Oh man, I love chips.  I miss you so much...

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OPEC hates Russia so gas prices are going down and now it's at 117.9¢/litre. Wooo!

Pointless Post #97 - Kindred Spirits Edition

A conversation I had this morning (I am the white message bubbles - @tsbutton):

 

Zack Shornick (@HotelsIPoopedIn), you da man.

Pointless Post #96 - Que Saran, Saran (Whatever Will Be, Will Be)

I can't find a roll of saran wrap that I cut in half that I use to wrap and tie things up with and it's really bumming me out.

o_o

EDIT: February 26, 2015 - Found it! It was hiding standing up on its end, disguised amidst a group of bottles underneath a sink.  Yay 8^D

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Gas has been in the low to mid 140s for a while (143.9¢/litre yesterday). 

Pointless Post #95 - Because Jesus Didn't Tap Edition

My friend asked me if I knew how to interpret the meaning of dreams and proceeded to regale a dream that he had about the two of us recently.  We were wrestling/fighting each other and he got leg hooks in and was starting to choke me out, but he was trying to warn me that I should give in so that I wouldn't lose consciousness.  Apparently I was being incredibly stubborn and in the end, he choked me out.  He was upset that he had to submit me, but more upset that I didn't tap. 

After telling me this dream, my friend told me that he hoped his dream didn't mean anything in regards to our real life friendship.  I thought it was amusing.

In other Tim-news, why do I have a pimple on my knee and on my leg? WHY?!??

Pointless Post #94 - Tim's World Cup 2014 Anthem

For the next month, this is what's going through my head:


There are too many games I want to watch, aaaaagh!  Especially Belgium! Man, I've been rooting for them for over two years now.  It's so footballing exciting.

Sigh.

EDIT: April 14, 2016 - I realize that the YouTube video initially posted doesn't work so here's another:

Pointless Post #93 - Oatmeal Musings

I eat instant oatmeal really, really often now. It looks like and reminds me of cat vomit.

Here's a video of Lance eating celery:




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Gas has been in the 129 - 131.9¢/litre for the past week and a bit.

Pointless Post #92 - New Calendar Edition

I don't have a 2014 calendar yet to put on my wall (I NEVER buy calendars and don't intend to start now), and I've found this past week having to squint a lot at the tiny "January 2014" preview portion of my old  December 2013 page just because.

So tonight I decided to remedy that by doing this:

Problem solved!

In other Tim-news, my Twitter feed is up and going strong for the past five days.  As promised, it is completely useless and of little value to.......the entire freaking universe.  But as this is the internet, I see fit to add my garbage into the mix, again, just because.  The thing that amazes me the most so far is that I'm actually gaining followers and haven't lost any yet.  What's wrong with you people!?

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EDIT: January 17, 2014
A few days after posting this, a super nice lady I know bought a calendar, but only wanted the pictures and gave me the numbered month sheets. WIN

Pointless Post #91 - Pop Culture with Grandparents Edition

Back in June 2009 when I was visiting family in Malaysia with my sister, we were at my great-aunt's home and she semi-randomly suggested, "Hey, let's call your grandmother in Australia! We're from the same village you know. I haven't talked to her in ages."  My sister and I agreed. We hadn't talked to our grandmother in a long time too.  And for the record, I'm doing this from memory so most of this is paraphrased and translated from hokkien, the regional Chinese dialect.

[dialing phone and ringing on the other end]

"Hello?"

"Hello? ...um, hey, hi Ah Ma! How are you? This is your grandson, Timothy.  I think Dad already told you, but Older Sister and I are in Penang right now.  We're at Great-Aunt's house. I didn't know you two were from the same village!"

"...ehhh? Aaah, Timothy? Did you hear? Michael Jackson just died today!"

I was completely caught off guard.  And then, I burst out laughing, not at the fact that a great musician died, but at the fact that this was the first thing my grandmother decided to say to me after not having talked to her for a few months.

[covering the phone]  "Ah Ma just informed me that Michael Jackson died!"

[family also laughs at the absurdity of the way the conversation just turned]

"Hahaha...um, I'm doing fine, thanks Ah Ma!"

[turning to my sister]  "Here, she wants to talk to you now."

I doubled over laughing.  I did end up speaking to her a bit more after that, but man oh man, for some reason I never ever thought that my at the time 81(?) year old grandmother would ever give me current news like that.

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Gas has gone down to 125ish and I even saw it for 123.9¢/litre tonight.

Pointless Post #90 - Stuff I'll Never Say Again Edition

Location: East Vancouver residential alley way
Time: 3:30pm

Me: Hi....is this your toilet?
Her: Yes.  Thank you.
Me: [takes toilet]

....aaaaand end scene.

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Gas has been in the 140s.  I got it for 139.9 a few days ago but now its back to 144.9¢/litre.  The news says Vancouver pays the highest price for gasoline in all of North America currently.

Pointless Post #89 - Self-Checkout Stupidity Edition

Last week when I was playing floor hockey, I suited up to play in net because one of our usual goalies was a little bit late. I played two games, the last of which was horrible.  After he arrived, there were now three of us, and so we rotated playing in net to keep our energy up.  I was really motivated for my third game to try harder.  That is, until the two other goalies told me I could take off my equipment and that it wasn't necessary for me to play in net anymore.  They were being gentle with me.  A player from the sidelines was observing what was happening, looked at me and said, "HAHA, Tim just got Schneider'd!"

Ugh, that hurt.

Oh yeah, last night, I saw a mother and her daughter trying to scan an onion at the self checkout at Superstore.  AN ONION. TWICE.

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Gas has been up and down in the 140s and rising.  I saw it 151.7¢/litre the other day. That made me mad.